I wasn’t allowed to have friends over when I was a child. My mother might have allowed it if I’d asked. My father probably would have, not aware of how the way we lived was seen by the outside world. But I didn’t allow it. 

I don’t remember exactly what age I was when I realized our house didn’t look like other people’s.

I don’t remember exactly what age I was when I realized our house didn’t look like other people’s. When we visited our maternal grandparents, everything was clean and tidy; everything had a place. It was calming to be there, no paths between the furniture with stuff piled up several feet high. When we ate, the table was easily set; you didn’t have to spend an hour moving things onto other piles before you could put down a plate. 

My father’s hoarding, I now understand, came from anxiety. He was a quiet man who used acts of service and gifts to show his love, not one for affection or giving attention. If he was able to give someone something they needed from his stash of assorted household appliances, car parts, or Goodwill treasures, it made his day. That was the fear, the fear that all hoarders have, that he would need something and not have it, or someone else would need something and he wouldn’t be able to help. He lived by the “just in case” philosophy, combing through thrift stores on an almost daily basis looking for stuff someone he knew might someday need. 

That was the fear, the fear that all hoarders have, that he would need something and not have it.

My mother’s hoarding came from a desire to feel happiness. As children, we didn’t understand why shopping trips with her took all day, leaving in the morning and not getting home until well past dark. There was always something she had to find, trying to feel some moment of bliss, only to toss the shopping bags into a room, forgotten and abandoned. Then she would move on to finding the next thing. She asked my husband once if he thought his own mother was happy. He told her he knew his mom was content. My mother was baffled by that answer. She couldn’t understand how a woman with so little could not want more.

As I was tapering off a medication that caused emotional blunting, I realized I’d been doing the same things as my parents, buying objects trying to feel happy and keeping things, hoping I’d get a huge grateful response when I gifted them to someone. I opened the hall linen closet and saw the evidence. The entire 60 square feet of storage was full: dozens of bottles of shampoos, conditioners, and body washes crammed in with scented candles, room sprays, and bath salts. My closet was the same; clothes with tags still on them and boxes full of shoes I’d never worn. An entire drawer of my dresser was full of costume jewelry, all untouched in their boxes. 

That moment shocked me. This wasn’t how I wanted to live or how I wanted to feel in my home. I started taking an inventory of sorts and teaching myself how to slowly declutter. The physical work caused mental evaluations of my reasons for having all of this stuff which led to more physical work of sorting and removing. The mental work was more difficult.

If you don’t deal with the mental reasons behind the hoarding then the clutter will find its way back. 

I’ve seen episodes of the hoarding shows where they pull dumpsters up to the door, don gas masks, gloves, and hazmat-type suits, then start pitching stuff out by the armload as the devastated person they’re “helping” stands in shock or sobs uncontrollably. To a hoarder, those things aren’t garbage. Those things mean something to them, just like our things mean something to us. That’s why the massive clean-outs don’t work in the long term. If you don’t deal with the mental reasons behind the hoarding then the clutter will find its way back. 

I wanted my decluttering to last, so I started small.

I wanted my decluttering to last, so I started small. The idea of a whole house clean-out was overwhelming. Some weeks I only worked on one drawer, others a closet or two. I asked myself if every item was something I wanted, needed, or even liked. I started keeping a box in the bottom of a closet. I still do this. Whenever I walk through my house and see something I no longer need or like (books, clothes, kitchen appliances, home décor, etc.), I put it in the box. When the box gets full, it gets donated—the whole thing. 

I live in a two-story house and this idea came to me one day as I was going downstairs to get something and was running bath water in the tub upstairs. If the tub flooded and water started dripping on me downstairs in the kitchen, what would I do first? Would I grab towels and try to sop up the water? Would I get buckets to catch the drips downstairs? Of course not. The FIRST thing I would do would run back upstairs and turn off the faucet. What good would it do me to try cleaning up if the water was still running?

I switched from a want mentality to a need mentality.

I took that approach with the clutter. I had to turn off the faucet of stuff coming into my house and keep it turned off until I felt content in my home again. I switched from a want mentality to a need mentality, teaching myself that feeling uncomfortable in the moment when I wanted to buy something was minor in comparison to how uncomfortable my cluttered home was making me.

I remembered my mother buying food, clothes, and craft projects even though we had plenty at home. She thought something on sale was a bargain, even if it spoiled in the pantry before we had time to use it. I looked around my home and promised myself I wouldn’t buy anything until I shopped my stockpile first, to use what I already had. It took years to finally use all the shampoo, conditioner, and body wash in that cabinet. I also had over a hundred bottles of nail polish I slowly used up, feeling so proud of myself when I could finally throw away an empty bottle. 

Meals became based on what we already had in the cabinet, allowing myself to buy a few items to connect the other things into a meal. Cleaning supplies were all pulled out of the cabinets so I could see what I had, and nothing new was bought until the bottles were almost empty. I also stopped buying new clothes, combining pieces in new ways to create new outfits and donating things that didn’t fit or I knew I would never wear again. 

I studied the sentimental things I was keeping and realized I wasn’t honoring the memory of my relatives by shoving things in drawers.

I studied the sentimental things I was keeping and realized I wasn’t honoring the memory of my relatives by shoving things in drawers. If it was important enough to keep, it was important enough to be displayed. I gave most of my great-grandmother’s hats away to other family members and found a place to display the ones I kept. 

 I started looking at the true price of buying cheap things compared to making investments in things that will last longer. It taught me to take better care of my stuff and that having more wasn’t better. Having something that lasted was an investment. I slowly changed my clutter habits; not buying just to buy, not keeping things just because they were a gift, valuing experiences over stuff, and switching to buying quality over disposable. 

I want my home to be my sanctuary, a place to rest and recover from the day and recharge for the next one. Slowly decluttering my spaces, removing the things that no longer served me, revealed a calm in me, both physically and mentally. 

Now I honor my parents with the kind of home they wanted, one with room to breathe and to appreciate what really matters.

Regina McKay is the wife of a firefighter, mother of five adult children, and passionate advocate of all things vintage, especially her pink bathtub. She works as an accountant but plans on using her experiences with mental health treatment to transition into a career in Criminal Justice/Mental Health reform. After hitting her rock bottom, she learned for her happiness didn’t come in a pill bottle. She now strives for contentment and appreciates moments of joy when they come.

The post How I’ve Learned To Deal With Clutter, From A Hoarder’s Daughter appeared first on The Good Trade.

So we created a quick style survey for our readers over 50 to see how they approach style and fashion these days. In a whirlwind of responses, we heard from over 300 of you, either over or just around 50 years of age, and were inspired by every single response. We started by asking for the top three words you’d use to describe your style, and the resounding response? Comfort and classic styles are key.

The top ten words most used in over 300 responses are below, but check out the image for more words you all used!

*One note, as I was reading the results, many readers described their style as “boho” or “bohemian”—and we’re thrilled that you all are embracing less mainstream styles that are driven by your own whims! But for the sake of this survey, I’ve updated that term to “eccentric” instead. Those words above are tied to anti-Romani sentiment, alongside another commonly used term in fashion—all these words are based on sweeping generalizations, historical inaccuracies, and have encouraged harm against the Romani population. The more you know!

Next, we asked you all to share your style icons, and you shared celebrities, brands, and influencers that inspire you most. Here’s what you said:

And now for the main event—after hours of reading through and painstakingly culling down your responses, we’re sharing some highlights of your style philosophies.

There are also several contrasting approaches, like where to draw the line on miniskirts, or how much (or little) color to wear. Whatever you choose and whatever your preferences, we’re thrilled that you all are embracing what *you* want to wear. We’ve got a whole new perspective on adding new pieces to our wardrobes now, thanks to all your thoughts.

Style Philosophies Of Women Over 50

• “I used to want my style to reflect what I wanted to bring to the table—intellect, passion, power—but now I see it as what I can offer with generosity: whimsy, comfort, attention.” – Maggie, 48
  
  
• “[My style is] my calling card, my first impression, my chance to be exactly who I am—something I was unclear about when I was younger but have total clarity on now” – Jenny W, 50
  
  
• “Not ‘giving up’, and trying to stay modern without overdoing it. Also trying to fit my menopausal body into clothes that look good and feel good.” – JM, 51
  
  
• “My clothes HAVE to be comfortable and I need to be able to move. I’m busy and if I have 10 minutes to do some yoga there is no time to change. That said, I never wear yoga pants, etc. in daily life. While I’m always dressed for last-minute yoga, a pair of statement earrings and I’m ready for the coffee shop as well.” – Anonymous, 51
  

“Not ‘giving up’, and trying to stay modern without overdoing it. Also trying to fit my menopausal body into clothes that look good and feel good.”

—JM, 51

• “I still dress however I like! I’ll wear a miniskirt, shorts, if the mood strikes just as easily as a pair of wide leg jeans with platforms. I’m very fortunate to have a lot of old clothes I can—and do—still wear!” – Arcadia M, 52
  
  
• “I find myself now and then still drawn to ‘fashionable’ items, but in general I believe, I have found ‘my’ style; plain, no fuss but sort of cool-chic. And that is a very relaxing kind of state.” – Nicole E, 52
  
  
• “Wear what I like and what feels good on. Break a rule or two. Dress up even when you don’t have too just for fun. None of these have been my mantras until this past year.” – Anonymous, 52
  
  
• “I like to be youthful and appropriate for my age at the same time. My perspective has definitely changed over the years, I was always on top of the latest trends when I was younger.” – CH, 53
  
  
• “I like to know what is in fashion but tend to stick with what I like, possibly making ‘modern’ tweaks. I used to be far more conscious of what I thought other people thought!! I would not leave the house without makeup on.” – Claire H, 53
  
  
• “Since gaining weight I don’t feel confident in anything I wear. I need help matching pieces together.” – VSM, 53
  
  
• “I try to be contemporary but not trendy. I’ve never been super trendy but always try to be myself. Comfort is key for me. I think style is personal. It’s whatever you want it to be and whoever you are. Regardless of age.” – Anonymous, 53
  
  
• “For me it is about being seamless. Having what you need for every occasion but being free to wear what you want when you want. Freedom. No rules. Simplicity. I also want to add fun. It should be fun to get dressed for the day.” – Karen S, 54
  
  
• “Welcoming comfort while still maintaining a publicly presentable ‘look’ for the workplace. Knowing the styles and fabrics/materials that do and do not work well with your body shape. Not trying to dress like you’re still 24, but not giving in to ‘the frump,’ either. This has pretty much been my style since my 20s and 30s.” – Anonymous, 54
  
  
• “Clothes that fit look the best. Keep it simple.” – Anonymous, 54
  
  
• “I want to express my own style regardless of what industry and society say. So not what, say, Athleta thinks I should wear and also not what society says is appropriate for a 50 year old. Whatever feels truly me. Some things I wear, middle schoolers are wearing (high top white sneakers) and some are just comfy and me (resale Free People, or if it’s new it’s sustainably sourced) and good for my body—like Softstar Primal shoes!” – BMH, 55
  
  
• “My perspective has DEFINITELY changed. Comfort is much more important, and breathable fabrics are necessary due to menopause. But I’m having a hard time defining a style for myself. I cobble together colors, fabrics and items most of the time, but I wish I could figure out a consistent way to dress, for work and for leisure. In my opinion, certain styles and colors can definitely age people (and since my spouse is 8 years younger than me, I’m not trying to look like his mother lol). I have always liked black clothing, thank god, because it’s very forgiving as I age. And I appreciate pockets WAY more than I used to.” – IV, 55
  
  
• “I have always loved fashion, I even dreamed of being a fashion designer in my teenage years! What has changed, is that now, in my 50s and overweight, I have more confidence to wear clothing styles, colors, patterns that I would not have worn even ten years ago. I wear what I like and those little voices in my head saying: too old, too fat, etc. have become whispers! I still dream of doing something with fashion in my next phase as I have been in HR since I entered the adult working world after college!!” – KH, 56
  
  

“Now, in my 50s and overweight, I have more confidence to wear clothing styles, colors, patterns that I would not have worn even ten years ago. I wear what I like and those little voices in my head saying: too old, too fat, etc. have become whispers!”

– KH, 56

• “As long as I am clean and neat looking, I’m happy with myself. It took many years for me to stop worrying about the way I looked and what others thought about it. When COVID hit, I saw people wearing very laid back clothing and thought, well if it’s good enough for them, it’s good enough for me too. I won’t wear anything that is not comfortable. I don’t need to look like I’m on a magazine cover and I spend big money on more important things like when something breaks around my house. Style to me is about priorities. Do I have to have those expensive jeans or can I get something fixed around my house instead?” – LW, 56
  
  
• “I value style over fashion. Fashion conveys a temporary look or feel, but style lasts over time. I have always owned quality essentials, but I used to buy fashionable clothes and wanted to fit in. Now I don’t care what people think and wear what makes me happy and fits perfectly—no adjusting or compensating for something that doesn’t fit or feel comfortable.” – Renata G, 56
  
  
• “Being mostly invisible/considered ridiculous by the young ‘ins is NBD, but also offensive too. I deserve to have choices that suit me without being sized into some old lady wear.” – SB, 56
  
  
• “I wear what I like and what is comfortable, whether it is the ‘fashionable in-thing’ or not. I do tend to pick more bold colors and patterns than I used to.” – Anonymous, 57
  
  
• “Fashion means classy, simple, and comfortable clothing and accessories that I feel good wearing. I am very tall and thin and have found finding clothing that fits very difficult throughout my life. I used to be happy wearing anything that had long enough sleeves or inseams even if the item was too baggy or otherwise didn’t fit properly. Now, I am more picky about my clothing—if it doesn’t really fit, I don’t purchase it or wear it. This means I have less to choose from and don’t take fashion lightly by going to the store and just buying throw away items. I sometimes still make mistakes with purchases, but I put a lot of thought into items—when will I wear it, how often will I wear it, and will it be wearable with many other items I already own?” – Doris B, 58
  

“I’m struggling to find a classic style of clothing that matches how young I feel with my actual age. I wind up feeling frumpy and wearing yoga pants everyday!”

– Kim C, 58

• “I’m struggling to find a classic style of clothing that matches how young I feel with my actual age. I wind up feeling frumpy and wearing yoga pants everyday!” – Kim C, 58
  
  
• “The younger me was interested in wearing brand names for clothing, pocketbooks etc. Now, I am not interested in buying items that are way overpriced just for the brand name. It’s not important to me.” – Patricia M, 58
  
  
• “Style means more to me now than it used to because when you are young you can pull off a good look without much effort. As you age you have to know yourself. Know the colors, fabrics and styles that flatter you. It simplifies your closet and your life and you will feel more confident.” – Michelle D, 59
  
  
• “I’d actually like to dress more stylishly, but it’s expensive, I’m often dirty from work I do, and I like to be comfortable. I just want to throw clothes on and go.” – Anonymous, 59
  
  
• “I really look for pieces that fit well and are comfortable—I really didn’t concern myself with comfort in my younger days. Comfort does not mean baggy or sloppy to me; it’s the way the material feels on my body. I like more classic pieces and can pair with a more trendy top or bottom. I really enjoy wearing dresses and jumpsuits—one and done!” – Anonymous, 61
  
  
• “Even though I am a mature woman I like to remain current with my fashion. I like to follow trends to a certain degree but I also want to wear age appropriate clothing (no more miniskirts for me!)” – Anonymous, 61
  
  
• “Being very thoughtful in what comes in—both with where I shop (secondhand primarily) and if I really need it, love it, and it adds value. Kind of staying in a color palette, too. But, in general I’ve never had a large wardrobe…I want to feel good in what I am wearing and truly feel like me—my personality versus what someone else is telling me to wear. And, now as a professional space creator (organizer), I see so much that doesn’t get worn.” – Heidi L, 62
  
  
• “The older I get, the more invisible I feel. So, I try to dress in a way that makes me stand out a bit—more youthfully, I guess.” – Jenny M, 63
  
  
• “Updating silhouettes makes me feel current, relevant, and confident. I have tried to add more color but find myself going back to black often.” – Anonymous, 64
  
  
• “Fashion means almost nothing to me. I wear what I like. And I’m a bargain hunter and a consignment store shopper. I’m a stewardship nut! And I don’t like buying expensive clothes. I’m 5’1” and do wish more retailers would make petites.” – JPW, 65
  
  
• “Style means dressing in a way that makes me feel good about how I look. I am nonconformist in that I hate wearing pants, and I color my hair in shades of blue, green and purple. I fight the impulse to dress in ways that fit in, but sometimes I lose that fight.” – Laura, 65
  
  

“Style means dressing in a way that makes me feel good about how I look. I am nonconformist in that I hate wearing pants, and I color my hair in shades of blue, green and purple.”

– Laura, 65

• “I live on the coast so I like comfort with flowy dresses and minimal, simply cut separates made with natural fibers. That said, I’m a large woman with mega health issues so I love easy, comfortable clothing but it’s hard to find clothes in my size (4X) that don’t look like they came from Walmart or the dollar store, ya know? Big women love style and sustainability too…just sayin’ 😉” – Lyn T, 65
  
  
• “I feel that it’s still a big part of who I am. I get a lift in my spirit when I have on a cute outfit, even if it’s very casual.” – KLO, 66
  
  
• “I don’t want my clothes to stand out—I want them to complement me in a subtle way, so that I look stylish but not trendy. And I really hate fast fashion for a bunch of reasons, mostly environmental.” – Suze S, 66
  
  
• “No one is looking at me! That’s really freeing.” – Anonymous, 66
  
  
• “Since I transitioned to gray hair four years ago, my colorist gave me some good advice: Make sure you dress with a sense of style that balances your grey hair and keeps you looking smart.” – Joanne C, 67
  
  
• “Comfortable but in style (teen style!!) shoes that are cute but work with arthritis, which usually means crooked toes etc. [I also like] capris that are fitted, but not baggy and have pockets, or straight leg pants.” – Anonymous, 69
  
  
• “When I was young I couldn’t afford the clothes I really wanted. Now that I can afford them, I no longer have the body.” – Anonymous, 70
  
  
• “In my last quarter I’m more interested in clothes that fit, feel good and that I enjoy wearing. I might not be the epitome of fashion but I don’t want to be irrelevant either!” – Anonymous, 71
  
  

“In my last quarter I’m more interested in clothes that fit, feel good and that I enjoy wearing. I might not be the epitome of fashion but I don’t want to be irrelevant either!”

– Anonymous, 71

• “Quality not quantity, clothes that fit, limited pops of trendy items. My style has refined over the years but not drastically changed.” – Anonymous, 71
  
  
• “Often lifestyle influences one’s fashion style. Now that I’m retired and since the pandemic, my needs and lifestyle have changed. More casual, more comfortable, easier. As a younger woman, all my focus was on looking a certain way. Mostly to attract men, which is not unlike other species. Brighter colors, pruning before an event or date. Style is a statement of where you are in your life and what you think of yourself. Today I feel sexy, my style will probably exude that message. Tomorrow I have an important meeting, my professional clothes will come out. Although, throughout it all, for the most part regardless of my age or lifestyle, my basic look always peaks through……classic with an edge.”” – DS, 72
  
  
• “I’m curious about what’s ‘in,’ but maintain my uniform of at least 20 years.” – Anonymous, 75
  
  
• “To look and feel my best without looking dated. A little verve thrown in to classy/classic” – Anonymous, 76
  
  
• “At this stage of my life, I want to remain classy, fun and a little trendy. Being retired leads to more casual clothing than when I was in the workforce. I still feel that some trends are only appropriate for certain ages.” – Anonymous, 77
  
  
• “I enjoy knowing what things are trending, but still try to stay true to the comfortable side of what my style projects.” – JBC, 80
  
  

“I’m curious about what’s ‘in,’ but maintain my uniform of at least 20 years.”

– Anonymous, 75

Emily Torres is the Editorial Director at The Good Trade. Born and raised in Indiana, she studied Creative Writing and Business at Indiana University. You can usually find her in her colorful Los Angeles apartment journaling, caring for her rabbits and cat, or gaming.

The post 300 Women Share What Fashion Over 50 Looks Like For Them appeared first on The Good Trade.

When I logged into my first online therapy session, I only had the intention of “feeling better.” I didn’t have the vocabulary for what I was experiencing—all I knew was that I was crying in my bathroom after a long weekend for no clear reason. I knew I needed a change.

When my therapist sent along a goals worksheet before our first therapy session, I was surprised. I had always imagined therapy to be a “show up, cry to a professional, become happy” kind of deal. Instead, I was getting homework. Wasn’t I paying someone else to do that for me? I didn’t understand what therapy goals were, or how important they’d become to me.

What are therapy goals?

News flash: Your therapist can’t do the work for you, they can only support you along the way. Therapy goals are the intentions we share with our therapist, who helps us create frameworks for measuring our progress and achieving them. (Plus, hello, accountability!)

Some types of goals for therapy might include: 

• Developing coping skills for anxiety or overwhelming emotions
• Reducing the intensity of symptoms related to anxiety and depression
• Increasing self-esteem and reducing negative self-talk
• Improving sleep quality and prioritizing restfulness
• Learning new communication strategies for complex friendships, romantic relationships, or family dynamics
• Processing thoughts and feelings about past trauma
• Exploring parenting questions and challenges
• Navigating a new or existing disability
• Inviting more mindfulness and presence into everyday life
• Changing harmful or unhelpful behaviors
• Sharpening your decision-making and boundary-setting skills
• Discovering more about who you are, what you want, and where your values lie

Embracing therapy as a safe place is precisely why goals, or intentions, are so important. This is your space, it’s your investment—it’s not a time to meet anyone else’s expectations but your own. I like to think of it this way: Our therapists are the personal trainers who offer meaningful feedback and support while we exercise our goal-setting muscles. If we can practice our goal setting in therapy, we may even be better equipped to set goals outside of it, too.

How do you set goals in therapy?

So say you’ve got a few ideas from the list above, or have some ideas of your own on what you want to focus on in therapy. How do you actually set them?

Not every therapist will use the word “goals,” but it’s common in your first session to let the therapist know what brings you to therapy and which outcomes are important to you. Erin Miller, a psychotherapist, asks first time clients: “If therapy ‘worked’ for you, what would that look like?” This helps focus on the optimal outcome of therapy—which is to journey a little closer to our best selves. 

If you don’t feel like you are setting goals, intentions, or feel like your outcomes are mutually understood, it’s worth exploring how to change the therapist you’re working with. (I’ve found it’s way easier to change therapists online than in person, which is a balm to my anxious mind).

The second, and equally important, half to goal setting is knowing how to measure them as you progress. “When I work with clients, I like to have them articulate their goals, and we put them in writing together,” says  Dr. Ruth L. Varkovitzky, a board-certified clinical psychologist. “We also try to identify how we would know if things were getting better, and how we want to measure progress.” That means you’re not just in charge of setting the goals but also having conversations about what progress and “success” looks like for you. 

This progress can be as straightforward as symptom improvement (which can be easier to measure in physical scenarios like fatigue, panic attacks, or sleep patterns). But not all emotional and mental progress is easy to measure, which is why you should create a framework together with your provider. Daino and the professionals at Talkspace encourage us to discuss with our therapists what it means for us to feel more fulfilled, cope with stress effectively, or find a better balance at work or with our partners.

For me, it’s usually—am I showering, eating, and staying hydrated? Am I proactively calling friends and family, and am I easefully doing the things I love to do? I can also always tell I’m on the mend from a difficult time by the state of my apartment; the cleaner it is, the clearer my mind and vice versa.

“Not all emotional and mental progress is easy to measure, which is why you should create a framework together with your provider.”

Can your therapy goals change?

I’m several years into therapy, and I speak from experience: let your goals change when they need to. Clients will frequently come in with one area of focus in mind, says Miller, and “through their work, they understand new goals and challenges that would be meaningful to conquer in therapy. Therapy is a journey, and throughout your work, your goals should be ever-evolving as you grow.”

This can be the same for your approach, too—maybe you thought you needed help solving an immediate problem but instead discover that it’s more worthwhile to explore the roots of why you’re experiencing it in the first place. Varkovitzky puts it succinctly and without a twinge of judgment: “Sometimes life presents us with situations that change our priorities.”

I’ve learned that mental well-being is a process, not a product, but the effort and investment is worth it. I admit, being honest and sharing your goals with someone else feels vulnerable. But the real vulnerability, the real work I think, lies in acknowledging our own need for healing. We deserve to feel fulfilled, and to have a network of friends, families, and professionals, who will uplift us and hold us accountable.

Because sometimes we just need a little help reaching our goals.

Looking to start therapy? Here are a few tips for finding a therapist and our favorite online therapy options. Additionally, here are our favorite online couples therapy options.

This post is in partnership with our friends at Talkspace. Use code GOODTRADE at checkout for $100 off your first month of therapy.

Emily Torres is the Editorial Director at The Good Trade. Born and raised in Indiana, she studied Creative Writing and Business at Indiana University. You can usually find her in her colorful Los Angeles apartment journaling, caring for her rabbits and cat, or gaming.

The post How To Set (Actually Helpful) Goals For Therapy appeared first on The Good Trade.

We follow these 9 websites that are as resourceful as they are empowering and uplifting—covering everything from personal finance to mindful meditation.

Check out our favorite newsletters for women as well!

1. The Cut

Our Go-To For | News & politics
Topics | Style, self, culture, and power
A Feature We Love | 180 Female Execs Launch Time’s Up Advertising

When The Cut was launched years ago, it was an online publication for women with style and self in mind. Today, they’ve grown to be a leading resource for politics, current events, and the honest, challenging conversations we’re having with one another. Content some days will talk about Danity Kane and ‘Vanderpump Rules,’ while others revolve around March for Our Lives, career advice, and breastfeeding at work. Because what it means to be a successful woman can include style, self, and discussion around current events.

2. Salty

Our Go-To For | Body positivity
Topics | LGBTQIA+ lifestyle, sex & body, relationships, parenthood
A Feature We Love | How I Finally Liberated My Black Fat Femme Body

Unapologetic and intersectional, Salty is not here for censorship or the corporate brand of feminism. This volunteer-run, independent website is dedicated to amplifying the voices of women, trans, and nonbinary people on topics others may otherwise shy away from. Their perspectives around #MeToo, sex work, and body positivity are refreshing and insightful, and we’d all benefit from taking some time to dig in and read. With core tenets such as inclusivity, community, fun, and respect, their content celebrates and uplifts authenticity and living the most truthful lives we can. 

3. The Good Trade

Our Go-To For | Ethical & sustainable living
Topics | Lifestyle, fashion, beauty, self, home, culture
A Feature We Love | The 9 Best Meditation & Breathing Apps to Reduce Anxiety

Over the last seven years, The Good Trade has covered content around sustainable living and investing with socially conscious brands, knowing that we often vote for the world we want with our dollars. Today, it has grown to reach millions of readers with engaging content ranging from mindful living to personal finance to seasonal fashion. If you’re interested in fair trade fashion picks, local and sustainable spots to check out, or inspiring curated reads from across the Internet, you’ll especially love The Daily Good, a 30-second read sent each morning full of the team’s personalized recommendations.

4. Blood + Milk

Our Go-To For | Empowering wellness information and stories
Topics | Sex, body, menstruation, mental health, motherhood
A Feature We Love | Sacral Healing + The Importance Womb Healing 

Blood + Milk is more than an online publication or website for leisurely reading. It’s a community resource; a call for awakening; a collective cry for gender rights and the end of oppression for women. The editorial branch of organic tampon brand Cora, Blood + Milk is our favorite site for longer editorials, empowering stories, and inclusive advice about sex, body, menstruation, and more. For the kind of articles you’ll be forwarding to all your friends, add this site to your bookmarks. 

5. Darling Magazine

Our Go-To For | Inspiration
Topics | Culture, relationships, travel, style, creativity
A Feature We Love | The Habits of Highly Successful Women Condensed in One Infographic

Darling Magazine was born as a print mag to redefine the art of being a woman: all images they use are untouched and their content is written to empower readers. But today, Darling has evolved to so much more than just a print magazine—it’s the ideal resource whenever you need inspiration and motivation. And if you’re not sure where to start, they’ve handpicked choices for you when you’re feeling ambitious, overwhelmed, or adventurous. With powerful features from the likes of Meghan Markle, Joanna Gaines, and Rupi Kaur, Darling is media that makes us feel loved, not less.

6. Autostraddle

Our Go-To For | LGBTQ+ lifestyle
Topics | Arts & pop culture, sex & dating, community, identities
A Feature We Love | How Queer and Trans Women Are Healing Each Other After Hurricane Harvey

A past winner of the GLAAD Media Award for Outstanding Blog, Autostraddle has transformed the lives of lesbian, bisexual, and queer women (as well as non-binary people) for nearly 10 years. They offer a fresh voice and empowered perspective to make all women feel like they’re valuable, equal, and noticed, so it’s no wonder that they’re the number one lesbian lifestyle website worldwide. And what we love most are the values they apply to all of their content: never critical or teasing of women’s physical appearances, quality over quantity with a point, and diversity and inclusion with both imagery and written content. The Autostraddle team is also more than just online: they host worldwide meet-ups, sell merch, and arranged getaways, because their ultimate goal is to create a community wherever they reach.

7. Career Contessa

Our Go-To For | Career advice
Topics | Career tips, interviews, jobs, coaching & webinars
A Feature We Love | Empathy At Work—And Why It (Really) Matters

Whether you’re beginning your career, navigating a transition at work, or negotiating your next raise, Career Contessa has the resources you need to make the most of it. We love that they have resources for women in a wide array of industries, and their library of downloads, courses, and podcasts is unlike any other. Kickstart the career of your dreams with their guided 28-day plans for finding a new job, making more money, or learning new skills—or just browse their archives for plenty of valuable career content.

8. Create & Cultivate

Our Go-To For | Entrepreneurship
Topics | Career advice, women leaders, digital & tech
A Feature We Love | 3 Entrepreneurs Share Their Secrets On Building A Smart Brand

Create & Cultivate’s mission is to support women looking to create & cultivate the career of their dreams, and they follow through. The ladies behind Create & Cultivate are chock full of sage advice and resources for both budding and established entrepreneurs, from year-one tips to starting a business to handling an especially slow day at work. And they’ve taken their content on the road too, with their beautifully-branded conferences and pop-ups so you can engage with them online or IRL.

9. them

Our Go-To For | LGBTQ+ culture & essays
Topics | Pop culture, style, politics, news
A Feature We Love | Inqueery: Indigenous Identity and the Significance of the Term “Two-Spirit”

For our weekly dose of pop culture, style, politics, and news, you can find us reading them, a proclaimed next-generation community platform chronicling and celebrating the LGBTQ+ community. In addition to sharing excellent and informative content (we love both the written articles and videos) them also sends out a newsletter for anyone who “wants the best of what’s queer” delivered right to your inbox.

The post 9 Lifestyle Websites For Women That We’re Obsessed With appeared first on The Good Trade.

Fast fashion is a design, manufacturing, and marketing method focused on rapidly producing high volumes of clothing. Fast fashion garment production leverages trend replication and low-quality materials (like synthetic fabrics) in order to bring inexpensive styles to the end consumer.

“Fast fashion is harmful to the environment, garment workers, animals, and, ultimately, consumers’ wallets.”

These cheaply made, trendy pieces have resulted in an industry-wide movement towards overwhelming amounts of consumption. This results in harmful impacts on the environment, garment workers, animals, and, ultimately, consumers’ wallets.

Read below to better understand the fast fashion movement’s history, context, and impact—and check out our list of 35 Sustainable Clothing Brands Betting Against Fast Fashion for ethical alternatives.

A Brief History of The Fashion Industry

Up until the mid-twentieth century, the fashion industry ran on four seasons a year: fall, winter, spring, and summer. Designers would work many months ahead to plan for each season and predict the styles they believed customers would want. This method, although more methodical than fashion today, took away agency from the wearers. Before fashion became accessible to the masses, it was prescribed to high society, and there were rules to be followed.

It wasn’t until the 1960s that a well-timed marketing campaign for paper clothes proved consumers were ready for the fast fashion trend. This resulted in the fashion industry quickening its pace and lowering costs. 

“Nowadays, fast fashion brands produce about 52 “micro-seasons” a year—or one new “collection” a week leading to massive amounts of consumption and waste.”

However, it wasn’t until a few decades later, when fast fashion reached a point of no return. According to the Sunday Style Times, “It particularly came to the fore during the vogue for ‘boho chic’ in the mid-2000s.”

Nowadays, fast fashion brands produce about 52 “micro-seasons” a year—or one new “collection” a week. According to author Elizabeth Cline, this started when Zara shifted to bi-weekly deliveries of new merchandise in the early aughts. Since then, it’s been customary for stores to have a towering supply of stock at all times, so brands don’t have to worry about running out of clothes. By replicating streetwear and fashion week trends as they appear in real-time, these companies can create new, desirable styles weekly, if not daily. The brands then have massive amounts of clothing and can ensure that customers never tire of inventory.

While brands like H&M, Topshop, and Zara have been the brunt of overproduction complaints, even luxury brands measure growth by increasing production. According to Fast Company, “apparel companies make 53 million tons of clothes into the world annually,” and the amount has surely increased since the article’s original release in 2019. “If the industry keeps up its exponential pace of growth, it is expected to reach 160 million tons by 2050.”

Is Fast Fashion Bad?

Many people debate what came first: the desire for fresh looks at an alarming rate or the industry’s top players convincing us that we’re behind trends as soon as we see them being worn. It’s hard to say, but there is no doubt that we thirst for the “next best thing” every day of our consumer-driven lives. (“10 Things I Hate About You,” anyone?)

Yet, with this increased rate of production and questionable supply chains, corners are inevitably cut. Clothing is made in a rushed manner, and brands are selling severely low-quality merchandise. There isn’t enough time for quality control or to make sure a shirt has the right amount of buttons—not when there is extreme urgency to get clothing to the masses.

The fast-fashion manufacturing process leaves a lot to be desired, and pieces are often thrown away after no more than a few wears. The same urgency that throws quality out the window also keeps the costs of these garments incredibly low. Companies like Topshop and Fashion Nova are greatly concerned with their bottom line and are banking on the “ocean of clothing” they churn out for profit. 

These brands earn millions of dollars while selling pieces cheaply because of the sheer number of items they sell, no matter the cost or markup. And garment workers are undoubtedly being paid well below the minimum wage. In the documentary “The True Cost,” author and journalist Lucy Siegle summed it up perfectly: ”Fast fashion isn’t free. Someone, somewhere is paying.”

“Fast fashion isn’t free. Someone, somewhere is paying.”

^{_{— LUCY SIEGLE}}

Moral lines get blurred, however, when factoring in how much more accessible and size-inclusive fast fashion can be. Ethical fashion advocates have worked hard to unpack this complicated narrative, but the cost and exclusive-sizing are still barriers for many.

The Human & Environmental Impact of Fast Fashion

All of the elements of fast fashion—trend replication, rapid production, low quality, competitive pricing—have a detrimental impact on the planet and the people involved in garment production. 

Brands like Boohoo, for example, use toxic chemicals, dangerous dyes, and synthetic fabrics that seep into water supplies, and, each year, 11 million tons of clothing is thrown out in the US alone. These garments—full of lead, pesticides, and countless other chemicals—rarely break down. Instead, they sit in landfills, releasing toxins into the air. Fast fashion’s carbon footprint gives industries like air travel and oil a run for their money.

“Many of us are familiar with the news about Nike sweatshops, but they’re just one of the many fast fashion brands violating human rights for the sake of fashion.”

In addition to environmental impact, fast fashion affects the health of consumers and garment workers. Harmful chemicals such as benzothiazole—linked to several types of cancer and respiratory illnesses—have been found in apparel on the market today. As our skin is the largest organ of the body, wearing these poorly made clothes can be dangerous to our health. 

This danger only increases in factories, towns, and homes where fast fashion is made. For example, according to the Environmental Health Journal, conventional textile dyeing often releases “heavy metals and other toxicants that can adversely impact the health of animals in addition to nearby residents” into local water systems.

The health of garment workers is always in jeopardy through exposure to these chemicals. And that doesn’t even take into account the long hours, unfair wages, lack of resources, and even physical abuse. Many of us are familiar with the news about Nike sweatshops, but they’re just one of the many fast fashion brands violating human rights for the sake of fashion. The people who make our clothes are underpaid, underfed, and pushed to their limits because there are few other options. Instead, we can proactively support garment workers and fight for better conditions and wages.

Qualities of Fast Fashion Brands

Here’s how you can spot fast fashion brands when shopping online or in-store:

• Look for rapid production, are new styles launching every week?

• Look for trend replication, are styles from a particular brand cheaply made versions of trends from recent fashion shows?

• Look for low-quality materials, are fabrics synthetic and garments poorly constructed, made only to last a few wears?

• Look where manufacturing is taking place, is production happening where workers receive below living wages?

• Look for competitive pricing, is new stock released every few days and then discounted steeply when it doesn’t sell?

The Rise of Slow Fashion

“It’s encouraging to know that there are brands, communities, and individuals out there fighting for the planet and the safety of garment workers.”

Although the fashion industry as a whole is guilty of committing many crimes against people and the environment, it is most evident when it comes to fast fashion. Society’s obsession with consumerism may make it hard to quit, but better options are out there. 

Slow fashion offers an alternative, with mindful manufacturing (sometimes including vertically integrated and in-house production), fair labor rights, natural materials, and lasting garments. It’s encouraging to know that there are brands, communities, and individuals out there fighting for the planet and the safety of garment workers.

By buying garments from responsible brands, speaking up for social responsibility and accountability, and going through secondhand shops, we can ensure agency and that we’re advocating for the environment and others. 

Audrey Stanton was born and raised in the Bay Area and is currently based in Los Angeles. She works as a freelance writer and has an exciting venture of her own in the works! Audrey hopes to continue to spread awareness of ethical consumption.

The post What Is Fast Fashion, Anyway? appeared first on The Good Trade.

With everything happening in the world, many of us find ourselves more stressed than ever and in need of support—we’ll be the first to admit we often feel this way. That’s why we’re huge fans of online therapy and virtual counseling to get the help we need, especially when face-to-face sessions aren’t always possible.

Online therapy is not only more affordable, but it’s an accessible and convenient service that provides high-quality support with trained therapists, anytime and anywhere. Many even have chat therapy options if you find yourself needing to talk to someone right away.

“Virtual therapy is an accessible, convenient, and adaptable option.”

Remember: There is no shame in therapy, whether you simply need to talk with someone or are interested in exploring treatment and prescription medication for mental health. From anxiety to OCD to marital challenges, these therapy websites and apps can set you up with a preferred counselor directly from your home (or car—because, well, sometimes it’s the only quiet space, right?).

Also, if you’re in the United States and looking to have your counseling sessions covered, here’s a great guide on finding online therapy that works with your insurance. (And for those in the UK: My Therapist Online is a great option!)

Whether you’re interested in phone, text, or video options, we hope these resources will guide you in finding the support you need. 💛 And if you’re looking for therapy options for you and your partner, we love these online couples therapy platforms.

Best Overall  |  Best For Couples | Best For Teens

1. BetterHelp

Best For | Individuals, couples, or teens
Notable Features | Bilingual options, 20K+ licensed therapists, financial assistance available, monthly subscription service
Price Range | $60–$90 per week (billed every four weeks)

For tailored, flexible online counseling—including unlimited access—check out BetterHelp. Start with a personalized survey to find the best-trained counselors for your unique circumstances, then message them anytime, anywhere. You can even schedule a live therapy session over phone, tablet, or computer, giving you a range of communication options. We’ve used BetterHelp, especially during the COVID-19 lockdown, to help support us through anxiety, depression, and family issues—we especially recommend it as a bridge service into working directly with a psychiatrist or therapist IRL. (Signing up for therapy is hard! Betterhelp is a great first step to get a therapist on your side). BetterHelp uses a secure system to protect your information and adhere to patient data privacy laws.

Review | “[My BetterHelp therapist] is a great listener and has very insightful knowledge to every situation I have. I love her approach and questions she asks. I leave each session feeling like I am growing in a positive direction.” – N.I.

2. ReGain

Best For | Relationship therapy
Notable Features | Options for individual or couples
Price Range | $60–$90 per week (billed every four weeks)

If you’re looking to regain companionship or affection, or need to address some tough relationship issues, ReGain is our suggested platform for online relational therapy. You can choose to participate as an individual or as a couple, and after taking a questionnaire to identify your shared goals, you’ll be paired with a licensed counselor. Done primarily through video sessions (and via messages anytime), it’s a private, flexible, virtual option that will help you tackle challenges straight on. ReGain takes your privacy seriously (read more here) and uses encryption to keep your sessions confidential and secure.

Review | “[Our therapist] is very knowledgeable and intuitive about the issues we’ve shared, and has created an open space for us to have important conversations we haven’t been able to navigate so far on our own. She is excellent at making us both feel heard, and at identifying the most useful direction for us to go in.” – L.I.

3. Pride Counseling

Best For | LGBTQ+
Notable Features | All identities welcomed
Price Range | $60–$90 per week (billed every four weeks)

For inclusive, accepting, and accommodating online therapy, Pride Counseling may be for you. Since the LGBTQ+ community can experience mental health concerns at disproportionately high rates, all the trained counselors are familiar with LGBTQ+ support and all identities are welcome. Whether you need to message your licensed therapist back and forth or want to schedule virtual sessions, you can do so in a discreet and affordable way. Because they don’t work with insurance companies, your information is not shared at any point, and all of their databases are encrypted and scrambled to keep your data secure.

Review | “So thankful I tried this. I was paired with the perfect counselor for me, and I already feel so much more clarity and much less alone. I wish I would have tried Pride Counseling earlier.” – Alexandria V.

4. Teen Counseling

Best For | Teens
Notable Features | Therapists who specialize with teens, app-based communication
Price Range | $60–$90 per session (billed every four weeks)

Teen Counseling offers support to teens ages 13 through 19 looking for professional help. Using an app, teens can communicate with licensed and trained therapists via text, live chat, and video—with flexibility around scheduling. Counseling is confidential but rest assured that the therapist will alert a parent if an intervention or serious action is required. If your teen is struggling—with bullying, self-esteem, an eating disorder, or anything else— there is help available.

Review | “We are still in the early stages of working with [our therapist] and using this platform, but so far I am incredibly pleased and think my daughter has been matched up with someone exceptionally qualified to help her. It’s been extremely evident since day one, starting with the first conversation […], how much she cares and wants to help.” – E.D.

5. Virtual Tia Clinic

Best For | Women (trans & non-binary individuals welcomed & celebrated)
Notable Features | Women’s health focus, $1 trial option, accepts select insurances
Price Range | $80–$130 per session; $15/mo for Tia membership

Tia is a modern medical platform offering healthcare to treat all of you, from your primary health needs to gynecological care. In addition to in-person services in NY, CA, and AZ, Tia also has virtual mental health services through the Virtual Tia Clinic. Tia accepts select insurance plans from the likes of Aetna, United HealthCare, and Anthem BCBS–depending on your insurance plan, you may be fully or partially covered. Paying out-of-pocket for therapy? An intro online counseling session is $80 with regular sessions at $130. The $15 monthly fee gets you access to an esteemed list of practitioners, participation in community events, and unlimited messaging with your integrative care team. They take your privacy seriously and practice a number of secure data protocols to keep your information confidential.

Review | “Joining Tia was the best decision I’ve made for my physical and mental well-being in a while. They’ve got you covered from GYN visits, to acupuncture (my personal fave), to therapy as well as community events. It’s a network of professional practitioners that’s enriched my life in countless ways.” – Dominika

6. Faithful Counseling

Best For | Christians
Notable Features | Unlimited messaging with your therapist, monthly subscription service
Price Range | $60–$90 per week (billed every four weeks)

If living a faith-based lifestyle is important to you, a therapist who is able to blend Christian principles with best clinical practices is going to offer the mental and spiritual support you’re looking for. Faithful Counseling offers a monthly subscription service to connect you with a Christian practitioner, allowing access to services at an affordable monthly rate. A branch of the BetterHelp platform, Faithful Counseling is a network of seasoned Christian professionals serving those looking for biblically-based mental health services. Read their Statement of Faith here.

Review | “[Faithful Counseling Therapist] is always patient, supportive, and quick to respond! She meets my situation with Biblical wisdom and clinical expertise, and I never feel like a burden.” – A.L

7. Talkspace

Best For | Individuals, couples, & psychiatric needs
Notable Features | Employee assistance programs available, resource library, psychiatry options, accepts select insurances
Price Range | $276–$516 per month (without insurance)

With over a million users, Talkspace is one of the most accessible virtual therapy programs around. The subscription-based service accepts select insurance and works with a number of employee assistance programs and schools. Start messaging with your suggested therapist right away through its encrypted platform or schedule a live counseling session via video. Talkspace also offers free mental health tests and resources, discounted subscriptions, and specialty services for veterans and members of the LGBTQIA+ community. Check out their privacy policy to learn about how they are protecting your data and information.

Review | “I have an infant so the idea of actually going out to therapy was daunting. This is much lower stress for me and I can check-in whenever works for me.” – Niva

8. Open Path Collective

Best For | Low-cost sessions; family or group sessions
Notable Features | Sliding scale, bilingual options, wellness courses available
Price Range | $30–$80 per session; $59 lifetime membership fee

Open Path Collective, a nonprofit, supports clients who lack health insurance or cannot afford typical pricing for therapy sessions. For a lifetime membership fee, you can find affordable therapists in your area who may offer online therapy in addition to IRL counseling. Open Path welcomes all identities, backgrounds, bodies, and orientations. Pro tip: If you’re looking for family, group, or couples therapy, you can usually share one membership fee.

Review | “I am so very grateful for this service. Without it, I would not be able to afford the very much-needed therapy for my daughters. Simply put, Open Path has saved my life and the lives of my family.” – Tom

9. Inclusive Therapists

Best For | BIPOC, LGBTQ+, Neurodivergent & Disabled communities
Notable Features | Bilingual options, centered on marginalized identities, reduced fee virtual teletherapy
Price Range | Varies; sliding scale available

Inclusive Therapists is a wonderful directory focused on celebrating all identities and abilities. This online platform centers BIPOC, LGBTQ+, Neurodivergent, and Disabled communities with a specific focus on social justice, liberation, and decolonization. That means every therapist here has been carefully verified to meet the needs of these communities, and you can expect culturally responsive and supportive feedback with every counseling session.

Review | “What don’t I love about Inclusive Therapists!? […] Use their database to search for therapists by the usual stuff (location, training, sliding scale rates, accepting new clients) AND by the therapist’s identity, cultural or spiritual knowledge, languages spoken, areas of focus…aka search filters that help you find someone who won’t gaslight you and will prioritize social justice.” – Alexis Rockley

The post 9 Online Therapy Sites For Affordable Counseling appeared first on The Good Trade.

Everywhere I turn on social media, someone is trying to sell me something. Last summer, the ads convinced me that I absolutely had to have a pair of roller skates. When Dry January rolled around, it was hard to pass by promotions from almost every spirit-free alcohol brand before eventually snagging a bottle of my own.

When so many of these posts seem organic, it can be hard to differentiate between a real recommendation and an endorsement solely for monetary gain.

Sure, building my skating skills was already on my to-do list, but did I need to buy a pair when I did? Was I really ready to give them the use they deserved just because Instagram recommended them to me? The quickly-faded novelty of my bubblegum pink skates suggests that I wasn’t. And one sip of my rum-less rum was enough to remind me that not everything is as great as the ads make them out to be. Both now sit in their respective closets, untouched for quite some time and creating guilt and clutter.

On the pages of my favorite content creators, you’ll find a plethora of product recommendations by way of brand partnership posts or other sponsored content. A typical morning routine video is often incomplete without promo for featured skincare, or vitamin supplements, or other carefully-placed products. And when so many of these posts seem organic, it can be hard to differentiate between a real recommendation and an endorsement solely for monetary gain.

Started as hubs to connect with friends and family, social media platforms have grown into vibrant settings for relationship-building and knowledge-sharing, and at the same time, giant marketplaces to sell products through both traditional advertising and influencers.

Brands recognize the value of credibility and authenticity that influencers build with their audiences and have steadily shifted their resources to accommodate them as marketing tools. This year, influencer marketing is expected to be worth a whopping $21.1 billion. The only problem? Adding that level of financial motivation can result in less-than-authentic endorsement content.

Research shows that higher levels of advertising make us sadder.

Between the ads that appear after every few posts on our feeds and prevalent sponsored influencer content, the constant encouragement to consume online contributes to a culture of overconsumption. Trends come and go quicker than the seasons, and we’re enticed to participate with our wallets—lest we be left by the popular crowd—just to toss aside gently used belongings a short cycle later.

Folks are getting fed up with it, and rightfully so: research shows that higher levels of advertising make us sadder. After comparing life satisfaction data from 27 European countries, a team of University of Warwick researchers found that higher annual advertising spending was linked to less satisfied citizens a year or two down the line. After all, ads are meant to make you feel like you’re missing out if you don’t buy into whatever they’re selling. It can be especially exhausting comparing your belongings to those of influencers—who, by the way, receive said products for free and are then paid to promote them. This is just one of many reasons why creators have started producing de-influencing videos—and not a moment too soon.

What is de-influencing?

De-influencing is the antithesis of influencer product marketing, in which audiences are encouraged not to buy things. It aims to help consumers see through brands’ marketing ploys and curb overconsumption prompted by following the trends. Influencers have taken to social media to share their perspectives on the popularized concept.

Most viral takes tell followers not to buy certain products that don’t live up to their hype and, in turn, promote the creator’s own recommendations, which may be lesser known or less expensive.

Most viral takes tell followers not to buy certain products that don’t live up to their hype and, in turn, promote the creator’s own recommendations, which may be lesser known or less expensive. For example, @alyssastephanie took to TikTok to share her favorite lower-cost alternatives to popular beauty products, amassing almost a million likes.

In this way, de-influencing has prompted mainstream reflection on how products aren’t the best just because they’re popular. Other creators challenge whether some items are necessary purchases at all, exploring how social media has pushed us to consume continuously. 

When we see certain products repeatedly, our associations with them grow stronger, and it can ultimately impact our decisions to consume. But just because we see ads or creator posts for something everywhere, it doesn’t mean the product is good or even a fan favorite: it mostly means that the brand paid to reach your screen. De-influencing points out that we can all consider these factors, including why we really want to make a purchase, before adding to our cart.

Regardless of its intention, de-influencing is still influencing.

Regardless of its intention, de-influencing is still influencing: persuading followers to align with values, in some cases accompanied by physical products. But it becomes a problem when its primary function fuels a never-ending pattern of unnecessary purchases and unrealistic expectations.

If nothing else, de-influencing reminds us of the role influencing—and social media in general—plays in making us discontent with what we have and inclined to buy more. It’s certainly been an extra push for me to reevaluate how I navigate these platforms and compare myself to those who are paid to make me want it all.

Nevertheless, there is an ever-expanding community of people, from creators and activists to everyday citizens, who have and will continue to push for more mindful and transparent consumption. As a content creator myself, my goal is to empower my peers to live eco-mindful lifestyles while only sharing about the sustainable products I truly love. I’d be remiss not to consider that I need resources to sustain myself, especially if I intend to dedicate even more time to creating for social impact. Still, figuring out where to draw the line on sponsored posts and reconciling these conflicting factors is a challenge.

Thoughtless promotion breeds thoughtless consumption.

What I do know is that thoughtless promotion breeds thoughtless consumption. Moving forward, I’m looking for more sparing and genuine influencer endorsements, supported not only by belief in specific products but knowledge of and alignment with brand values. For many of us, de-influencing is just the latest label for ongoing efforts. The terms may change, but the concept will remain the same as its supporting community grows: together, I know we can make our takeaways from de-influencing last.

Nia Shalise (she/her) is an eco-conscious content creator based in Boston. You can usually find her amplifying sustainable practices online while drinking tea, or coffee, or possibly both. Connect with her on Instagram!

The post What Is De-Influencing, And Is It More Than A Trend? appeared first on The Good Trade.

Retrograde motion happens when a celestial body appears, from our vantage point on Earth, to move backwards in the sky. It’s an optical illusion, explains Kirah Tabourn, an astrologer and host of The Strology Show podcast. “It’s important to know that the planet isn’t actually going backward,” Tabourn tells The Good Trade. “All planets retrograde at some point in their cycle as seen from the Earth.”

Mercury retrogrades more than other planets because of its short year—it takes just 88 Earth days for Mercury to orbit the sun once. That means that three or four times a year, the planet appears to move backward in the sky, entering a retrograde motion that lasts for around three weeks each. 

According to astrology, each celestial body influences a different aspect of our lives. Venus, for example, rules over beauty and passion, and the moon governs our emotions and our inner world. Mercury is the planet representing communication, reasoning, transportation, and technology, so when she enters retrograde, we tend to feel it acutely in our busy world that’s centered around communication and tech. These kinds of issues might look like delayed flights, a broken appliance, or a text from an ex. 

What Mercury In Retrograde Might Mean For You

While Mercury retrograde gets a bad rap for causing technical mishaps, travel delays, and miscommunications, it’s not all crummy. Mercury entering retrograde is much like the weather shifting—not good, not bad, but a neutral, essential part of life on Earth. We tend to move full steam ahead so often that when Mercury retrogrades and encourages certain parts of life to slow down, it can actually have some positive effects. 

Mercury entering retrograde is much like the weather shifting—not good, not bad, but a neutral, essential part of life on Earth.

“Retrogrades are regular invitations to slow down and reassess where you are in particular areas of life,” says Tabourn. “[They] can be immensely healing and times of recentering or recalibration,” she says, adding that decluttering our spaces (physical, mental, and digital) can help us during the recentering process that a retrograde invites in.

Maybe you take this time to do some retrograde motion yourself. Revisit an old project you put on the back burner, reach out to an old friend, or rediscover a book or movie you used to really love. It also might be a great time to do some inner reflecting by meditating or journaling. 

And when you’re prepared to slow it down a bit, this period’s mishaps might become easier to handle. If someone from your past reaches out, consider how it makes you feel. If your train is delayed or you’re in the worst traffic jam of your life, you’ll be forced to exercise patience. If you misplace an important email or document, you’ll learn from your mistake next time. Mishaps happen all the time for loads of different reasons—that’s life. 

When Mercury is in retrograde this spring from April 21 to May 14 in Taurus, those with placements in Taurus might feel the retrograde’s effects most keenly. Likewise, the retrograde early this year in Capricorn might’ve affected Capricorns more than others. Mercury also rules over Gemini and Virgo, too, so folks with placements in those signs might always feel Mercury retrograde periods more strongly. 

When Is Mercury In Retrograde In 2023?

Before and after each official three-week-ish Mercury retrograde times are the retroshade periods, also called the retrograde shadow periods, during which the planet isn’t yet moving backward but is moving slower than usual. This is why you might have retrograde-like experiences before or after the planet is totally in retrograde. 

Here is every Mercury retrograde period in 2023, along with its pre-shadow and postshadow dates:

December 29, 2022 – January 18, 2023

Mercury retrograde was in Capricorn late last year into early this year. The preshadow began December 13 and the postshadow ended February 8.

April 21 – May 14, 2023

This spring, Mercury retrograde will be in Taurus. The preshadow begins April 7, and the postshadow will end June 1.

August 23 – September 15, 2023

Late this summer, Mercury retrograde will be in Virgo. The preshadow begins August 4, and the postshadow ends on September 30.

December 13, 2023–January 1, 2024

Towards the end of this year, Mercury retrograde will start in Sagittarius and move into Capricorn, carrying over into the new year. The preshadow begins November 25, and the postshadow ends January 20.

Natalie Gale is a Boston-based freelance journalist. When she’s not writing about art, food, or sustainability, you can find her biking to the farmers’ market, baking, sewing, or planning her next Halloween costume. Say hi on Instagram!

The post What Actually Is Mercury Retrograde? (Plus 2023 Dates To Watch For) appeared first on The Good Trade.

Seafood is an excellent source of lean protein, omega-3s, iron, and vitamins B and D, and it’s one of the most carbon-efficient foods on the planet. If you’re looking to increase your seafood intake or learn some new cooking techniques, try checking out the free digital Marine Stewardship Council’s (MSC) 2023 Ocean Cookbook, featuring sustainable fish recipes from all over the world, utilizing seafood like scallops, cod, shrimp, and tuna.

Whether it’s in a gooey tuna melt or rolled up into a maki roll, tuna is one of the most versatile kinds of seafood. It’s that versatility that makes the fish the third most popular seafood in the US, after shrimp and salmon, says Chef Adrienne Cheatham, whose tuna tonnato salad is featured in MSC’s 2023 Ocean Cookbook. “Given its popularity, it’s important to know how to look for sustainable tuna choices,” says Cheatham, “so we’re ensuring healthy fish populations now and for our future generations.”

What makes seafood sustainable?

According to the MSC, in order to be considered environmentally sustainable, seafood must come from healthy fish populations, have minimal impact on the marine ecosystem, and be properly managed (so no overfishing). Sustainable seafood can be harvested in perpetuity while still maintaining a healthy environment. That’s what “sustainable” means, after all — able to be sustained.

While most of the fish we get here in the states is wild caught, seafood harvested via aquaculture is the fastest-growing form of food production worldwide according to the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA). Note that not all wild caught seafood is sustainable, and neither is all aquaculture seafood.

Because most of our fish comes from the ocean, it’s especially important to purchase sustainably fished seafood to ensure healthy fish and marine populations in the future. “I’ve worked with seafood for the entirety of my cooking career and am incredibly passionate about making sure we have access to it for years to come,” says Cheatham.

How do you know if your seafood was harvested sustainably?

In short, read the labels! One of the easiest indicators to look for is the MSC blue fish label, meaning the product has been certified to the MSC Fisheries Standard. The MSC blue fish label provides assurance that the seafood is wild-caught and comes from a certified sustainable source.

Another way to determine your seafood’s sustainability? Research the company that makes it. Companies with sustainable practices want you to know about them, so it doesn’t take long to Google a seafood producer and find out if it puts sustainability at the forefront of its business model.

The Perfect Tuna Salad Recipe for Earth Month

For MSC’s 2023 Ocean Cookbook, Cheatham crafted an easy meal with sustainably fished tuna in the spotlight. Her tuna tonnato is full of pantry staples like relish, mustard, and tuna, along with a few fresh veggies for a “light, bright dish that’s perfect for spring and summer,” she says.

Find the full recipe here, which uses lemon, celery, onion, eggs, and potato to liven up tuna salad, bringing it from sad desk lunch territory into “a great lunch or a patio snack to fix for guests, or dinner on a night in,” says Cheatham. She serves the tuna mixture over greens and alongside some satisfying, crusty bread. My local grocery store didn’t have any endive, so I heaped the tuna salad over a bed of spinach and arugula instead—it was one of the best lunches I’ve made in a long time. 

Cheatham notes that while the dish looks light, it’s packed with protein from the tuna and eggs. And she emphasizes the importance of buying canned tuna with an MSC label on it.

MSC’s 2023 Ocean Cookbook features dishes from seventeen different chefs representing cuisines from all over the world, like Smoked Salmon and Mango Salad and Steamed Hake with Vegetables. Each recipe is paired with a quote from a fisherman who catches the seafood variety to help “make the connection back to the ocean,” says Cheatham. 

“Sustainability includes our future, is the way I think about it,” said Jack B. Vantress of the American Albacore Fishing Association in Cheatham’s recipe. “So it’s important to choose sustainable seafood because this is our future.”

THIS STORY IS IN PARTNERSHIP WITH OUR FRIENDS AT THE MARINE STEWARDSHIP COUNCIL

Natalie Gale is a Boston-based freelance journalist. When she’s not writing about art, food, or sustainability, you can find her biking to the farmers’ market, baking, sewing, or planning her next Halloween costume. Say hi on Instagram!

The post How To Ensure Your Seafood Is Sustainable, According To The Marine Stewardship Council appeared first on The Good Trade.

Deep breathing and mindfulness have long been considered solutions to stress; the focus on inhales and exhales centers us in the present moment and helps to keep us grounded. It’s no surprise, then, that meditation and breathing apps are so helpful to combat anxiety and depression, as well as life’s everyday challenges.

These specific apps focus on meditation, deep breathing, and sleep sounds. Many include daily push reminders, guided lessons, calming music, and nature sounds to round out the experience. No matter what you may need, the right breathing exercise can help you keep calm and carry on.

If you want to get your kids involved, here are the best mindfulness apps for youngsters! And if you’re seeking out one-to-one support, we have online therapy options that are both affordable and accessible.

3. Othership

Best For | Music-driven breathwork
Cost | Free for basic features, $17.99/monthly or $129.99/annually for a premium membership; scholarships available
Features | Five rotating free sessions, 500+ guided sessions, sound healing, hypnosis, somatic release therapy, vocal toning, self-massage, mindful walking + working, movement + dance

An app that skillfully combines breathwork and meditation, immersed in music, with sessions ranging from 60 seconds to 60 minutes? We’re in! Othership makes choosing easy, with sessions that energize (“Up”) or calm down (“Down”), as well as all around options meant to support your brain, body, and what they call Big Lung Energy. Guided by psychotherapists, wellness practitioners, hypnotherapists, artists, DJ’s, spiritual teachers, and life coaches, these sessions are anything but boring, and are sure to help you develop a strong, meaningful mindfulness practice you’ll be sure to stick to!

4. Simply Being

Best For | Affordable meditation
Cost | Free for basic features, $7.99/monthly, $49.99/annually
Features | Five meditation time-lengths up to 30 minutes, additional music/nature sounds

Launched by the Maddux duo (they have more than 40 years of meditation training and are most known for their popular Meditative Oasis podcast and apps), Simply Being offers you peace during the most stressful moments of the day. With five time-lengths and an intuitive user experience, you’ll find yourself immersed in soothing music and gentle instructions. For just $1.99, you can unlock everything within the app, including optional nature sounds and 30-minute voice-guided meditation.

5. iBreathe

Best For | Breathing & anxiety
Cost | Free for basic features, $2.99 to remove ads & other in-app purchases to customize options
Features | Pre-defined presets, customizable reminders, can send breathing exercises to others

If ease of use is the name of the game, then iBreathe is right up your alley. This uber-simple, beautifully designed app reduces clutter to ensure a mindful and centered experience. Whether you’re battling anxiety or insomnia, iBreathe offers deep breathing exercises for relief. Best of all, the app pushes reminders to your phone, so you can take some time out of your busy day to be fully present. Plus, you can send breathing exercises to friends and go through them together for shared moments of zen.

The post The 5 Best Meditation & Breathing Apps To Reduce Anxiety appeared first on The Good Trade.